It's Okay
by damnmysterytome
Summary: Carol and Daryl have a conversation while following the car Daryl believes took Beth.


**That was some episode, huh? I just wanted to write Caryl and I haven't done it a while and that scene where Carol tried to leave just stuck with me.**

**I own nothing from The Walking Dead, though I wish I did.**

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><p>Daryl was driving slowly now, they were just a few feet behind the car that Daryl claimed took Beth. He hoped they were getting close to their destination and they hadn't hoped that he was following them. It was silent, too silent. They'd been following the car for probably close to an hour and Daryl knew that what gas Carol had put in the car was not going to last much longer. He just hoped that the car would lead them to wherever these guys were holding Beth. It seemed like luck that he'd found the car, if he hadn't gone looking for Carol he wouldn't have.<p>

He couldn't help but think back until moments before the car had drive by him and Carol, how he had found Carol fixing the car. When he'd noticed that she was missing in the church, he went looking for her, since no one else had clearly noticed that she was gone. And he figured out exactly where she was going, he remembered the way she looked at the car they found earlier, the way she tested the battery. He was sure that she'd been trying to leave the group. He couldn't believe that she would want to leave the group... Leave him. After all they'd been through? He glanced at her again, at how stone quiet she was. He didn't like it. He missed her laugh, missed her smile.

"You were going ta leave, weren't you?" Daryl asked. He glanced at Carol out of the corner of his eye.

Carol glanced away from him briefly before looking back to him. Honestly, she didn't know if she was going to leave at that moment. She wanted it to be an option. Carol loved the group, loved her family. But she didn't feel like she had a place there anymore. Every time she looked at them, she thought about what she had done, what had happened. They might have welcomed her back with open arms, but that didn't mean that she _felt _welcomed back with open arms. "What?"

"When I found you fixing this car... You were going ta leave." Daryl stated. Her lack of answering his question all but confirmed the fact that she wanted to leave him, leave the group.

Carol sighed and took a deep breath, of course Daryl would try to talk to her like this while they were in a car and she couldn't just walk away from him. "I was just fixing the car, a second option in case everything went.."

"Dammit, Carol, don't lie to me." Daryl cut her off, growing increasingly frustrated. He understood that Carol didn't want to talk about it, whatever she and Tyreese had gone through had to have been awful. He knew there was more to the story. And even in the few days that they'd been back together, he knew that it was affecting her, breaking her down. "I know what I saw. And I get you don't walk to talk to me about whatever the hell you and Tyreese went trough. I _get _it." Daryl said. "But you can't do this. You can't pull away from..." He stopped and growled, he didn't know what he was supposed to say to her.

Carol stared at Daryl, feeling a lump form in her throat. She did want to talk about it, she knew that she needed to talk about it. But she couldn't bring herself to talk about it. She couldn't tell Daryl what she'd done, she couldn't tell anyone what she'd done. She did the right thing, she knew that. But it was still hard for her to talk about. "Daryl.."

"I can't lose you." Daryl quoted Carol from two years ago. Carol's bottom lip trembled and she looked out the window, making note of the signs on the buildings as they drove. What had she done to deserve having someone like Daryl in her life? She was pushing him away and yet here he was, still trying to break through the walls she'd put up.

"I'm still here." Carol said.

Daryl shook his head. "No, you ain't. You're here, but _you_ ain't here." Carol stared out the window as Daryl spoke, taking a deep breath. She knew he wasn't going to let this go, despite how much she wished that he would. "Talk to me." He pleaded, not short of begging anymore.

Carol shut her eyes and leaned her head back. "When I found Tyreese, he was with Lizzie and Mika too. We found this little house that was really... It was nice. We actually thought of staying, we thought about not going to Terminus.. Until Lizzie... Killed Mika." Carol shared. Daryl almost slammed on the breaks of the car when she said that. He knew how much those girls meant to her, knew that she loved those girls. "She was going to kill Judith, she would have... I didn't have a choice."

Daryl looked at her, realizing what she meant. No wonder shed kept to herself so much. He dropped one hand off the steering wheel and reached his hand over to go over the hand on top of Carol's hand that was on her lap. Carol turned and looked down at his hand and then looked over at him.

"You did what you had ta do." Carol was surprised, she hadn't expected Daryl to be so accepting, to look at her the way that he was. "It's okay."

"Before we had realized that Terminus was bad... I told Tyreese that I was going to make sure the place was safe but I wouldn't stay. He didn't fight me on it, so I thought... I thought that he agreed with me, that I didn't deserve..." She trailed off sadly. "I feel like a complete stranger to my own family." Now that she started talking, she couldn't stop.

"Carol, it's gonna be okay. You're still here. We ain't dead. We're good." Daryl assured her.

"Is it? Is it okay?" Carol asked, looking up to see the car. It was still just a bit ahead of them, but Carol couldn't imagine that they didn't know they were being followed, especially now that it was light out. She hoped this would be worth it and they'd find Beth. She wanted to bring Beth home to Maggie, bring part of their family home.

"It's okay." Daryl repeated, not moving his hand from hers. Carol flipped her hand over and laced her fingers through Daryl's, letting out a relieved sigh.

"Thank you." Carol said, her voice breaking again. She didn't know if she believed Daryl, that it was okay but maybe it would _be _okay someday. Maybe one day she'd feel okay.


End file.
